The substitute trainer introduced new exercises that didn’t work for me. The problem wasn’t the exercises themselves but how they were presented. Instead of including me and explaining the benefits, he gave monologues about why his approach was superior. He criticized my regular trainer and dismissed everything I had previously done as worthless. Even if he was right about some things, his communication style made me shut down.
My defense mechanisms kicked in, and I went into a passive mode where I just said “yes” and “okay” without really listening. Mentally, I was counting the minutes until the session was over. I thought about workplaces where employees show the same pattern – they’ve stopped caring and only do the bare minimum. This is the result of being overruled instead of included.
For change to be accepted, we need to involve those affected. It’s about creating a dialogue where their experiences and perspectives are respected. Otherwise, we risk creating resistance instead of growth.
Another issue was that the trainer focused more on correction than encouragement. My regular trainer always makes me feel strong and capable, even when I face challenges. Friday’s substitute did the exact opposite – he corrected every movement and made me feel inadequate. When I left the gym, I felt defeated and frustrated.
Feedback is a powerful tool, but without encouragement and respect, it can do more harm than good. A simple reminder: Change and feedback are not just about WHAT we say but HOW we say it.
Have a brilliant day!
Ulf Lidman
